Thanks to smart phones and instant internet access social media is a whole world of funny you can now keep in your pocket. During your commute to work, lunch breaks, sat waiting for friends or for the bus, no matter where you are or what you’re doing social media is an easy distraction and great means of escape.
While some might use Snapchat or Facebook to keep up to date with their own social circles Twitter is a chance to stay in touch with your favourite celebs. At GoHen we have been working hard at our own social media pages and you can share daily laughs with us on our Facebook and Twitter pages as well as updates on our latest news and special offers.
But if you’re in search of even more top Twitter accounts to follow for a laugh or two then in no particular order here are our top 20 funny female tweeters;
Periwinkle Jones @peachesanscream
“If I had £1 for every time someone asked me why I wasn’t married yet I could buy another 12 cats.”
Periwinkle is a Creative at Buzzfeed with a brilliant sense of the absurd. Daily banter and regular links to Buzzfeeds latest offerings as well as her own weird and wonderful musings.
Not ready to be out in the real world where I have to wear clothing and not all food is chocolate.
— Periwinkle Jones (@peachesanscream) April 22, 2014
Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman
“We’re all just molecules, Cutie.”
Surely the undisputed Queen of Twitter, 5.2 million followers catch Sarah’s tweets on life, love and all kinds of funny.
“Everything I learned about applying make up on I learned from 14 year olds on YouTube”.
Gráinne Maguire @GrainneMaguire
“Bad fortune ne’er should daunt me for I am young and the world is wide.”
Another Tweeter from the crazy world that is showbiz. Grianne brings her comedy stylings to twitter with fantastic effect. Shine on indeed.
“Any woman brave, determined and crazy enough to put eyeliner on, while on a bus, deserves an instant OBE. Shine on you crazy diamond”.
“If I’m not eating, laughing, fucking or reading then I’m probably wishing I were running late or still asleep.”
Bigmouthedwoman is a food blogger and wit. A special kind of funny with food based banter mixed with her own wry take on the world. If Twitter had drinks then she’d be the caffeine that makes your coffee happen.
Five people I know have birthdays today. FIVE. As a result I shall no longer taking applications for new people to know.
— bigmouthedwoman (@bigmouthedwoman) April 21, 2014
Julieanne Smolinski @BoobsRadley
I think it would be hilarious to put a bra on a deer, but I wouldn’t do it personally.
Julieanne isn’t one to mix much sentiment with her comedy musings which makes her brilliant. Every tweet is like a little, digital comedy treat and the laughs just keep coming.
“If I could host dinner for any five people from history, I’d pick a person who severely wronged me and the band The Eagles, then I’d leave.”
Sarah Millican @SarahMillican75
“Feminist and lover of food.”
If you’re a fan of Sarah “on the telly” then you’ll love her tweets, it’s more of the same from one of the UK’s best stand-ups comedians. She also keeps fans informed of tour dates and gigs so you’ll know when she’s in town.
“I thought I heard a pigeon. But it was just my tummy rumbling adorably. Curry ordered. That’ll sort it”.
Mary Charlene @IamEnidColeslaw
“roly poly little bat-faced girl”
US based Mary is all about the funny. Sharp, massively entertaining, she certainly doesn’t take prisoners but will have you “lolling” on a regular basis. 155,000 followers can’t be wrong.
Is your man bored in bed? Make him sleep on the floor
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) April 17, 2014
Scribbler. *Sex features heavily* *Renaissance Woman* Also *Just a bloke in a nice wrapper* Writer and all round funny girl Sarah Pinborough has written for The Sun and The Independent. Daily ramblings which all modern women will identify with (secretely she’s our new best friend she just doesn’t know about us yet). “Working? At 7.30am on Easter Sunday morning? What fresh hell is this? *gets face stuck in an Easter Egg…*”
“If you can’t play the blues you might as well hang it up…” Irish charm and humour mixed with a smattering of attitude and occasional sarcasm has made Monica one of our Twitter favourites. She seems like the perfect girl to have beside you in an argument so you don’t end up walking away suddenly thinking up the thing you should have said because Monica will already have said it for you.
You should probably stop driving all night, Cyndi, it makes your eyes all squinty and no man is worth that. — Monica (@LittleHarmonica)
Charlene deGuzman @charstarlene
Charlene really doesn’t give much away on her Twitter profile and we haven’t taken to stalking yet. We can tell you she is laugh out loud funny, seriously mischievous and well worth adding to your Twitter list.
I don’t see what the big deal is, straitjackets are just forever-hugs.
— Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) April 11, 2014
Bec Hill @bechillcomedian
“Comedian. Doodler. Playa.” Describing herself as “An Australian in London” you won’t find her behind the bar like many of her compatriots but you will find her on stage in many top comedy venues and her Tweets are possibly a testing ground for great material.
SO embarrassing! I’m chewing gum in my room and Mum just walked in on me masticating. — Bec Hill (@bechillcomedian) April 22, 2014
Isabel Fay @isabelfay
Little dancing monkey with a pencil!
Comedian and friend of Rufus Hound Isabel even managed to make having a baby sound like fun. “I’ve been growing a human man in me. He’s now out of me which is nice.”
“Squeezing avocados in Tesco I muttered “Ready To Eat, my ass” to a man nearby. But I said it without punctuation. Now we both feel obliged.”
If you were looking for one word to describe Jenny quirky” would come high on the list and she has a fab take on the world that’s always entertaining. Her tweets often read like a perfect Sunday morning pick me up after a good night out. Funny and crazy in perfect harmony.
“Bereft of inspiration, I just walked into my spare room to have a look around. Found a red satin cape. Put it on. Still nothing.”
“Don’t hate the player, hate the game. Any game you like. I’m choosing tiddlywinks.”
If Twitter accounts had warnings Dolly would be kept well away from kids. Brilliant, funny and totally irreverent. With over 10 thousand followers already, Dolly takes time to interact with her fans and share their rants.
Have woken up looking as though a Spanish pensioner broke in during the night and tried to restore my face.
— Dolly (@TheDollSays) August 27, 2012
Zoe Lyons @zoelyons
Comedian, dog owner, skier, eater, drinker, procrastinator, bad spellor
Brighton based comedian you might recognise from the telly. While her name might not be in every household just yet Zoe is definitely one to watch and well worth laughing along with on Twitter.
“Arrived at hotel, bathroom floor is best described as deep shag pile pube carpeted, it’s like Chewbakka did his bikini line in here.”
Nat Luurtsema @natluurtsema
BAFTA-nominated writer, comic, destroyer of worlds and etc.
Like many on our list Nat is more than just a member of the Twitteratti but also a BAFTA nominated writer to boot.
“The waiter in Carluccios is surreptitiously feeding me chocolate-covered coffee beans like I’m a tame mouse. And you know, I’m ok with this.”
Miranda Hart @mermhart
Comedy actress and writer, dog owner and wannabee pop star.
Another one “off the telly” we love Miranda’s show and her tweets are often just as funny. Not the most prolific tweeter but her ponderings are random and witty and just make you smile which is what tweeting is all about in our eyes.
“Hello Blighty. You are a bit windy. Makes two of us. #planefood”
Suzanne Azzopardi @TheAzzo
TV development geek – Co-author, When One Is Expecting… – Partial to Star Bars
You know all those thoughts you come up with and think “I probably shouldn’t say this out loud…” Suzanne says them all. Brilliantly funny and every so slightly mad in the best possible way.
“Dreamt that I was hanging out with Michael Hutchence. He didn’t know any of the words to Dance Magic Dance from Labyrinth. Disappointing.”
Dreamt that I was hanging out with Michael Hutchence. He didn’t know any of the words to Dance Magic Dance from Labyrinth. Disappointing.
— Suzanne Azzopardi (@TheAzzo) April 21, 2014